You dive into this whirlpool of mush with your beloved and everything is just perfect bliss. But as you settle to that comfy feeling of coupledom, your guy decides to stick a thorn on your rosy romance by pointing things he does not quite like about you. “Well now, that is just offensive! There is no way I’m going to change for you!” you may say. But according to Dr. Cyndi Haines, author of the Book of Change, changing yourself for your man can be beneficial for your relationship so long as he does not ask for too much, and it feels positive and inspirational for you. Just call it compromise! So swallow your pride and check out these tips on how to better your relationship — and yourself without looking like a total sell out.
When He Wants You to Change Your Look
So he tells you that you’re amazing just the way you are. But through well-timed comments, sighs and silences, he sends you out these signals that he isn’t too happy with the way you look. He gives you that occasional “You should try other kinds of clothes sometimes.” Or “I think the no make-up look works best for you”. So what do you do when your man suddenly transforms himself to your very own stylist? Indulge in his whims. According to Dr. Pepper Shzwartz, author of Everything You Know About Love and Sex is Wrong, Changing yourself for your man and pleasing him is good. If he thinks that you’d look great in something, then you probably would. So give it a try.“ Just make sure he doesn’t go way overboard by dressing you up like a Barbie Doll!
When He Wants You to Hit The Gym More Often
So one day, you just felt like asking him if you’re fat or not, all the while expecting he’d answer you with a “You are the most beautiful and sexiest girl I’ve ever laid eyes on” line. Instead, he gave you that awkward pause and hesitantly suggested that it’s time for you to hit the gym! Before giving him a mean uppercut, evaluate the situation first and see if you’re figure have actually gone out of control these past few days. If it has, is it alright for you? If the answer is no, then take your man’s words as a form of motivation. Better yet, to make it a lot easier for you to shape up, involve your guy in your fitness plan! Ask him to jog with you or hit the gym together. Not only will you lose those flabs, you will also have some great bonding time with your man. Compromise but be careful in doing so, if you are perfectly happy with the way your body looks yet he keeps on suggesting liposuction or breast implants, tell him to hit the road. That man is not worth it.
Things You Should Never Give Up
Your Circle of Friends
It is completely understandable if your guy asks you to compromise a little bit and spend more time with him than your girlfriends. Bit if he asks you to drop all of them at once and demands you to focus all of your time, effort and energy to just him — then that would be an entirely different story.
Your Career
If he truly cares about you and wants you to be happy, he would support you with whatever career path you decide to take all the way — even with the occasional overtime and weekend business trips. Just don’t forget to compromise and give time for your very supportive man, alright?
Signature Quirks
Changing yourself for your man to the extent that you lose the real you is a big no-no! If he asks you to get rid of your quirks or mannerisms – nose twitching or your mad scientist-kind of laugh — that make you so distinctively you, he may be looking for a perfect robot not a real woman.
